Ten things about Jack that you probably don’t know.

1. Jack now is the proud owner of 7 teeth.
2. He has figured out how to turn up the volume on the record player. I was making dinner in the kitchen when he crawled away, about 2 seconds later our house was shaking with thunderously loud music. I ran in the living room worried that he would be scared, that our house suddenly sounded like the inside of a mosh pit (if Linda Ronstadt were played in mosh pits.) I found him unfazed working on his dance moves.
3. Jack has dance moves. He bobs up and down when music he likes comes on. Lately he has been rocking out to the Graceland album by Paul Simon, and apparently he is a huge Linda Ronstadt fan.
4. His double chin is so adorable that it has actual magical properties. If I am feeling particularly frustrated with him, I can look at his little wobble and feel immediately calmer and more enamored.
5. Jack has developed a sense of possession. He now understands when something is his, or if he is using something. When you take it from him, HE DOES NOT LIKE IT. He will in fact, protest fiercely if it is taken (usually for safety.) By fiercely I mean that he will bite you. And if you are not in range of his mighty choppers, he will crawl after you, until you are in range and then bite you.
6. The other day Jack was playing with a friend, who as friends will do, took a toy from him. Jack grabbed for the friend and bit down with all his might. In his fit of revenge his aim was off and he accidentally bit his own hand. His first lesson in instant karma.
7.  Jack has a tiny problem…. with biting.
8. He is really sweet about wanting to share food with us when he is eating. He will hold out the skankiest, most manhandled  morsel of food in his chubby hand while grinning and beaming at me. Then I have to eat the proffered skanky piece of food and say thank you. I would not want to be rude.
9. He is becoming more and more social. When he is crabby or sensitive my instinct is to keep him close to home and un-stimulated, walking, playing, reading and nursing  so he stays settled. However I am discovering that Jack does not respond well to his tactic. When he is a crab, it seems to help to get him out and around other people.  On Sunday I almost canceled a Fathers day brunch with another family, because Jack had been fussing all morning at home; throwing food, slapping the dog in the face,  biting me and screaming when I removed him from said dog. I was nervous about the havoc he could unleash in a restaurant but decided to risk it.  As I was warning our brunch companions about the possible anarchy in the works, Jack was smiling radiantly at the entire restaurant and demurely eating scrambled eggs. Clearly delighting in being around new people. And clearly making me look like the Mama who cried wolf, AKA crazy.
10. He lights up when he sees me. A specific for Mama smile. It is the most incredible thing. It feels like falling in love and it happens multiple times a day.

Perhaps it is a little strange to throw ones self an anniversary party, to celebrate your marriage at the tender age of 5 years. But the truth is I am really proud of our journey over the past 5 years and wanted to celebrate it. And I really do love to throw a party. For the record I also know a few people who are on their second marriage and wedding, with in the last 5 years. Why should divorcees have all the fun party planning?

Looking through these photos makes me feel so loved. It meant so much to me that so many people came together to celebrate. Glancing around the party I saw most of my favorite people in the world . The fact that they were all at our farm, eating pie, laughing on hay rides and dancing under the stars made it even sweeter. It was simultaneously nostalgic and oh so present. I flashed back to a hundred nights growing up, dancing in cornfields and gazing at bonfires. While I watched by babe laughing at fireflies and falling asleep under a prairie moon. Perfect.

Remember the anniversary party that we threw? Regarding that, three rad things happened.

1. The ladies at 100 Layer Cake are featuring our party. I am beyond honored to be included on their gorgeous blog.

2. Jennifer Emerling edited all of her  photos from the day, and they literally stole my breath out of my lungs, that’s how stunning they are.

3. We decided that The Farm was made for parties, and to deprive it of parties is cruel. So starting spring 2013 we will be opening up the property as a wedding/celebration venue.

Tomorrow I will be posting part 2.

Please excuse the poor photo quality it’s all I could manage with my phone in the heat of the moment.

The big news in these parts is that Jack took his first steps this weekend! He has been walking holding on to furniture, or people or the poor dog for a while. But these were his first unsupported steps. The blessed event took place at the Sharkpig offices. He really wanted to play with this hanging, dangling, yarn poof (not really sure what to call it) that is hanging off the pencil sharpener decorating the office. He stood up from a squat, took a step forward than grabbed the poof. I tried not to make a big fuss over it, but did gasp rather dramatically (very daytime drama/Emmy worthy.)

I am not sure he really understands what he did. Although I had a suspicion that it was coming. He has been behaving in a similar manner as when he started crawling. He has been having a harder time falling asleep, because his body is just to full of energy. Even after bath and massage, his little muscles are still taught and tight. He has also been a little sensitive and attached, which is not his usual way.

He has taken a few steps every day since, although it has yet to evolve in to full-blown walking. I can’t believe how much my little Home Slice is growing. He will be 10 months in a week. Onward and upward!

Dear Lynch

Watching you become a father has been an extraordinary experience. Watching you care for and nurture our son does something to my insides that can only be described as a slow melt, or a languid liquify. It turns me in to a puddle of mushy love for the two men in my life, the small and the tall.

When I found out that we were having a son I thought our little boy would be exactly like you. I imagined deep brown eyes, olive skin and dark hair.  I also assumed that our son would inherit your strong and silent disposition. When Jack was laid on my chest the first things that I noticed were his surprisingly white lashes fluttering on his bright pink cheeks and little tufts of strawberry blonde hair.

You have commented that you think Jack is just like me, and I do see traces of myself in him. This bodes very well for Jack, because you understand me and complement me so well. It brings tears to my eyes to know that you will be able to do this and be this for our son. I am sure that no mater who or what Jack grows to be you will be an excellent Father. But it is already evident that Jacks active and intense nature draws strength from your reservoirs of patience, love and focus, as mine does. Happy 1st Fathers day my love.

I have been interested in participating in the early childhood program at the Waldorf school in Pasadena. When I was pregnant a friend gave me the book “You Are Your Childs First Teacher.” Of all the books I have read about raising the littles, this is the one that has resonated with me the most. The tone of the book is so practical and really takes in to account the mother and the childs well-being. It is nurturing without being coddling or promoting over parenting. I also love the emphasis on nature. The children are outside most of the day. My friends whose children attend Waldorf schools in crueller climates than LA (Seattle, Iowa) have the most amazing array of all-weather gear. They get sent to school looking like tiny whalers going to sea for a fortnight.

I spoke with an administrator from the school today about their next session which is September through June. The deposit is due this month. It seems kind of official for a parent/baby program but that’s how school is in LA, expensive and official. This brings up all kinds of questions about next few months that I have been trying to avoid thinking about.

A film that Lynch is producing has a really good chance of being made late summer. He would be on location for about 3 months, and we would join him.  We won’t know if it is actually happening until the last-minute (ah the joys of independent film making.) But if it is, we would be out of LA until late fall. There is nothing I can do, to plan for a movie that may not be made. I have been keeping my fingers crossed that it will and ignoring the practical aspects of what that will entail for our little family.

So far this strategy has been working out really well. I, like Scarlett O’Hara, am proficient at putting off unpleasant thoughts for another day. Unfortunately I don’t think that Scarlett had to deal with rather expensive and timely school deposits. It makes denial tricky.  But for now denial mixed with procrastination seems my best angle. So,  ”I can’t think about that right now. If I do, I’ll go crazy. I’ll think about that tomorrow.”

These days mind keeps drifting back to this time last year, when I was nearing the end of my pregnancy. Before I knew my boy, before I knew myself as a mother. Everything seems nostalgic; the smell of peaches, the heat and the summer holidays approaching.

While we were in Iowa we visited King Edwards Orchard. Two friends of mine from high school started an orchard in memory of one of their fathers who passed away a few years ago. And invited all of their friends to plant trees. Now they have hundreds of fruit trees in a beautiful tribute. Last year as a family of two we planted an apple tree, this year as a family of three we went back to admire its growth and progress. As I watched Jack standing next to it grabbing at the leaves, I got more than a little misty.

The time has charged past, leaving me dizzy in its wake. I find myself aghast at the thought that my little babe will be a whole year old in a few months. Time seems so relative. While it is shocking to think that he is almost a year, it is shocking to think that he is ONLY almost a year. How we were ever with out our Home Slice?

Home from our travels and feeling slightly tender and homesick for Fairfield (me, not Jack, he is fine.) But also filled with a sense of resolve and optimism that only occurs when I am away from my everyday environment and can look at life with fresh eyes.

As I settle back in the groove and bustle of LA life again, I am determined not to let the pace of life for my family get too hurried. I am committed to spending more time just goofing off with Jack. We are constantly together, but sometimes it seems that there is always something for us to do. Time to make breakfast, time to pick up the house, time to go to yoga, time to make lunch, time to nap, time to hike, time to make dinner, time for bath, time for stories, time for massage, time for bed, and so on the next day. Until the wheels of our life are turning at such a fast pace that an entire day will go by where I won’t have spent 10 minutes making him laugh at something silly. And the Home Slice loves to laugh. He can really get going, in to a full rollicking laugh that turns his face bright red and sounds like his belly is going to split from the containment of so much joy. It really is the most adorable thing, and I dare you to not laugh along with him.

Last night at dinner we were seated next to a table that was considerably jollier than ours (and had drunk considerably more margaritas.) They were laughing and yelling in a manner that would have been deemed obnoxious if it hadn’t been for Jacks enthusiasm for them. He kept craning his neck to turn around and stare at them. The louder they grew, the further he stretched his little head and hands out towards them, clearly wanting to join in the revelries. When they really got on a laughing jag, he would join in  laughing as loud as he could, and then turn back to face our table, still wildly laughing but staring all of us down. As if to imply that we needed to turn up our own level of excitement, or maybe we could release him from his high chair so he could join the “fun” table.

It is so interesting to watch as he developes his own personality and to determine what he needs from me. Right now he needs me to remember to spend a few minutes doing the duck noise that makes him laugh, or what ever else gets a 9 month old going. And really who does not need more laughter peppering their days.

Over a year ago Lynch and I decided we wanted to throw a big old country party at our farm in Fairfield Iowa to celebrate our 5th anniversary. We wanted a multi generational shin-dig, that friends would fly in for and most of the town was invited to. We wanted to spend  a day eating, drinking, dancing, and being merry under the sun and into the night.  Something reminiscent of the Party at Twelve Oaks in “Gone With the Wind,” meets a fete Jay Gatsby might have thrown meets the barn raising in “Seven Brides for Seven Brothers.” Basically the kind of part I have wanted to attend since I was 12.

It ended up being such a magical day. So many people traveled to come and celebrate with us. Everyone fully embraced the spirit of the party. The judges of the pie baking contest were the epitome of professionalism as they chose the wining pie. Everyone donned white dresses and seersucker suits while babies were stripped naked to run and play. Barbecue was eaten and servers passed around trays of margaritas while wearing vintage aprons over their white dresses. People played horseshoes and croquet with gusto. A country band sang in the twilight and and the amazing Human Jukebox, Michael Antonia, spun records as the stars crept out. Everyone danced into the tender hours of the morning, which is an impressive display of energy after a 12 hour party.

The highlight for me was a late afternoon hay ride through the surrounding countryside. It was during that magical hour of day that photographers covet, when the light makes everything glow as if internally lit. I was looking around at all or our loved ones, everyones faces rosey with excitement and hair rustling in the wind. Jack was nestled in my lap and Lynch was sitting next to me, arm around us both. I will never forget that moment. I felt so overwhelmed with love as the perfect tangerine sun set over the rolling emerald hills punctuating my light heart.

large parties are always a bit of a beast to accomplish, especially if you happen to have a slight perfectionist streak. But sometimes they exceed your expectations and turn into the backdrop for so much fun and revelry that you start eagerly planning the next one before the last cup is cleaned up. I’m thinking “Midsummer Nights Dream” meets Dianas wedding from “Anne of Green Gabbles” for the next one.

P.S I was so busy being a dutiful hostess and Mama that I was errant in my photo taking. Lucky for me the talented Jennifer Emerling documented the day. Here is a little taste of Jens photos to come.

Happy anniversary my love. I am so glad that we met on the bus when we were 15. That was one of the brightest spring days I have ever known. Being your wife is one of my greatest privileges and being mother to our child is my greatest Joy. I love you to the moon and back Jon Boy. xoxoxo